You have to be down sometimes in order to rise.
It’s amazing to me as I am on this journey of self-discovery, how many times I have tried to move past what I was feeling and downplay my sadness. So many times, I pack it down deep inside in order to not feel it. To me not feeling it was better than being sad. But what happens next? The panic attacks. I would pack it down so deep and keep putting more on top, that at some point it would bubble over and that is when the panic attacks happen – when I’ve packed all the feelings, stress and pain so tightly inside that I can’t pack anymore.
I’m learning that you must feel the pain and be down in order to rise above it and move on. I’ve started – for the most part because I am not perfect – feeling the pain when I can. Sitting with the pain, noticing it, validating it, and then I am able to move on and possibly let go. I cannot always let go but if I can move away from the pain and step forward it lessens it’s hold over me.
If can just release a little bit of the pain that I hold inside, I will be more open. I won’t get to the point of a panic attack. I know I can’t release it all, I am only human, but I can make room for the stress and sadness that are bound to happen. Knowing that when it does, I will be able to deal with it, feel it, validate it and let it go. Because you need to be down sometimes in order to rise.
I wish I knew this years ago, but my journey hadn’t started. I needed to live that life in order to appreciate the journey I am on now. Happiness is not handed to us. It involves work and we need to be able to create it. Sadness and hopelessness will happen, but how we react will determine our happiness. Live it, feel it, notice it, validate it, let go, and move on. Even if the pain is there it will become less. No matter how down and depressed you are, you will always rise again.
After all, a rainbow only exists after a storm.